Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Report on the 0-star hotel….


..as I sit here exhausted and giggly, I have to share our hotel with you.  I do actually read ratings on sites like bookings.com, so I have to confess that I’m perplexed.  It has a satisfaction rating of 8.1.
I’ll certainly grant it a point for location.  I think that’s it.
The rooms are actually located around the corner from the hotel, if that makes any sense.  In fact, it’s a completely different building with the entrance on a different street.  This is not highly unusual for hotels in larger European cities, but one doesn’t usually wade through a miasma of sewage to get to the stairway.  After climbing umpteen stairs, you emerge from the fuliginous stench.  Thankfully, the rooms are not on the odor level.
The rooms themselves are plain.  I take it back.  Every wooden surface has been stenciled within an inch of its life.  There are four beds in each room, with mattresses that are shaped to your body…or not, depending on your body’s shape.  The hills and valleys remind me of the Carpathians.
Each room is fully equipped with a sink.  Thankfully, since the bathroom is down the hall.  The bathroom is fully equipped with – air freshener.  No soap, no towels.  I did go by the lobby to request soap and shampoo (gasp!) and was greeted with a mystified look.  The receptionist scurried around and dug into the stash under the stairs, and finally came up with 6 packets of shampoo.  When I pointed out that there were 7 of us, he dived back into the cupboard and finally emerged  with a seventh.  Just in time, since I was ready to equip an expedition to find him.
But, we’re tired, we have accommodations, and we’re in…Venice!  So we’re happy.  Actually, the kids are having a blast because I’m allowing them to jump on the mattress, under the logic that it won’t do any additional damage.
Oh, did I mention the TV?  It’s a full 14-inches, color, and has ONE CHANNEL!
Cheers,
Alexandra

11 comments:

  1. Wow, sounds like a very special place!
    But I know you all will never forget your trip to Venice...
    Love you
    Vovo

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  2. Sounds as bad or worse than the hiking hostels I stayed in in Austria. In one place there was a large platform with some kind of mattress on it and everyone just got in their sleeping bags....so you ended up sleeping next to any random person. And since showers were extra, and everyone had been hiking, the odor must have approached the level of stench that you're experiencing. I didn't pay extra for the shower I don't think, so I probably contributed to the overall miasma.

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  3. You didn't mention the scale 8.1 out of...

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  4. You've given us a useful boogeyman. From now on, when Trey misbehaves, we can say "Clean your room, young man, or we'll send you to Venice!"

    Paul

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  5. Fuliginous - SAT word, SAT word!!

    Tricia

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  6. I better not let Sharon read this until after our trip there. After the luxurious rooms in the Philippines, i'm sure she's expecting as much from the cultured Europeans.

    Granddad

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  7. I hope your time in Venice is wonderful and that the events of your hotel room become memories that make you smile!!

    Mrs. Tolentino

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  8. Maybe you can trade the TV for some soap and towels.If you spend anytime in Venice watching TV, you're all crazy. Get out and see that beautiful city. Take a water taxi to the islands of Murano and Burano if you have time.

    Jeff

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  9. Looks like I missed your earlier post about Burano. Glad you all got to go there. Murano is also worth the time if you get a chance.

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  10. Oh my!! Adventures in European traveling! This will be something really funny that you laugh hysterically about when the kids are grown-ups, home for the holidays, and you talk about those funny family stories! Glad you are making light of it - and besides, as you pointed out, you are in VENICE!!!! That's worth a bit of discomfort!

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